JiMBO's Hollywood Screen Kiss [Director's Commentary]

To this day, Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss is still one of my all-time favorite GLBT movies, after Mambo Italiano, To Wong Foo, D.E.B.S, and The Broken Hearts Club, of course. Although I do find it strange that Sean Hayes, the title character, has deflected all questions about his sexual orientation. I suppose, after playing a flamboyantly gay character on Will & Grace, he doesn't want to be typecast in only that sort of role.


In his own words, "Being an actor, the less people know about my personal life, the more open-minded they can be about each role I play." I respect that, so long as he remains an ally to the GLBTQ community; but still, we're hard-pressed to find openly gay role models in A-List Hollywood.


And the two friends I was referring to are Janelle and Alexis. Janelle and I have been close friends since elementary school, bonded together by the fact that we were the only two black kids living in Pasadena. My coming out only brought us closer; she had figured it out years ago and was very supportive. We still talk, she was the first to write essay responses for my project, and last night I helped "Nelly" move her girlfriend into a new apartment. Unfortunately, Alexis didn't take it as well as I had hoped, and she and I have lost touch in the past couple of years. She married her high school sweetheart in Hawaii over the summer, and I wish them all the best.







UPDATE: Sean Hayes openly discusses his sexuality for the first time ever in the April 2010 issue of The Advocate!

Everything in the Universe Is Connected [Movie Transcript]

Adaeze: Whatever you believe in, it centers you. If you have any problems, you can pray to your god or meditate or whatever to connect to nature. That's what I think, my idea of God is that God is a higher power but God is also the trees, and people are parts of God.

We're all connected in some way, and once we focus on that connection, we can solve all our problems. The ideas of nature, love, and God are all interconnected, and if we all concentrated on that connection, most of the world's problems wouldn't happen, because greed and all that stuff just get in the way. Just let everyone love each other. That's all I like. (laughter)

The Importance of Being OUT [Director's Commentary]

Sean and I met at the first ALLiES meeting of 2007, and ever since then he's had a Love-Hate relationship with the group; he believes in being discreet about his sexuality and devote most his efforts to other advocacy groups like the NAACP. He and I have had at least one epic public argument over issues like openness, pride, and a responsibility to the community. One year later, we were able to put aside our differences for this interview, and much to my surprise, his views have changed, I found myself agreeing with some of his responses, and we've kept in touch regularly via FaceBook.


Although I would never call it "a sexual decision," I agree that it is important for people to come out of the Closet, not just for themselves but also for the sake of the community. I think that honesty is always the best policy, and Coming Out lifts a huge burden off one's shoulders--no longer having to hide their desires or switch pronouns in conversation.



And as Sean pointed out, being Out does limit your job opportunities, especially if the company and/or its investors are conservative. The sad truth is that in many states, it's still perfectly legal to fire someone because of their sexual orientation. In fact, two years ago ALLiES participated in a letter writing campaign to get the Employment Non-Discrimination Act through Congress.

The Importance of Being OUT [Movie Transcript]

Sean: It is essential to be Out. I feel that, especially in today's generation, it's very difficult to tell your friends, it's very difficult to tell your family members but it's important to be Out. Most importantly to yourself.

I feel that "being gay," as we call it, is a lifestyle: it's not just a sexual decision, as some may feel. It impacts every aspect of your life: what job you get, where you live, the people you interact with. So being Out is very important.

It takes time. For some people, it takes a long, long time to Come Out to themselves, so then they can tell the people in their lives. But it's so important to be Out and to be comfortable with who you are and how you're living your life.

JiMBO's Hollywood Screen Kiss [Movie Transcript]

(Playing ♫ This Is My Song ♫ by Petula Clark)

I know why the world is smiling,
Smiling so tenderly,
It hears the same old story,
Through all eternity




During my senior year of high school, I found a movie called Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss, starring Sean Hayes a.k.a. "Jack" from Will & Grace. And I really enjoyed the movie--so much that it inspired me to come out to my two best friends at one of my Halloween parties.



Love, This is My Song
Here is a song,
A serenade to you

I showed them this clip of "The Tuxedo Dance" because I think it's one of the most romantic things I've ever seen on film.

The world cannot be wrong,
If in this world,
There is you.

The Initiation [Director's Commentary]

Well, as you can see, I'm standing in what is now an Overflow Parking lot. In 2005, when I first arrived on the Gettysburg College campus, I was immediately told to report there, but back then it was the Marching Band's Practice Field. I'm pretty sure the College paved over it sometime in '08.


In high school, I had been a prominent member of various Bands as well as the Drama Club, and I cherished the feeling of camaraderie and community I found in those clubs. So it was only natural for me to stick with it when I went to college... even I though I had absolutely NO desire to be a Music major or become a professional Clarinetist. Nope, not for me.


I KNOW, Carson Kressley graduated from Gettysburg! How random is that? Haha, the sad thing is, aside from politician Ron Paul, Carson Kressley (Class of 1991) is the biggest celebrity to come out (literally!) of Gettysburg College. During my freshman year, the college even sponsored a field trip to attend a private NYC party hosted by their beloved Queer Eye guy; President Haley Will, Jaimie Schock ('09), and Hanna Ackerman ('09) were the lucky Gettysburgians in attendance. Apparently, the President got drunk and made an ass of herself at the event... to the shock and awe of ABSOLUTELY NO ONE.


About two months ago, I went back to Gettysburg for the 2009 Gay And Lesbian Alumni reception, hosted by ALLiES. While I was there I had the pleasure of finally meeting someone who had interacted with Carson Kressley during his stint at Gettysburg. His former classmate told us that while Carson was here, he was a quiet transfer student who kept to himself, was not out of the closet, and was not an advocate for Gay Rights. Unlike other people, I wasn't shocked or disappointed... because I had already done my homework eight months prior.


Back in February, I was looking through the SPECTRUM (Yearbook) Archives and I noticed that Carson was not in the 1991 ALLiES club photo... but y'see, that ALLiES photo did not exist! It was a different time, a different political/social climate, and I don't blame him for not being comfortable enough to come out as an openly gay man in college. And for whatever reason, ALLiES was temporarily unavailable and/or insufficient as a support system. As I learned very quickly, in its 24-Year history, ALLiES has always been like a rising phoenix; every 4 or 5 years the group dies out completely only to be resurrected years later by a voracious group of freshmen. In 2005, we were those freshmen.


The summer after high school I often daydreamed about how wonderful college would be, and how I could finally start over with a clean slate, and be 100% honest with my classmates from the very beginning. Undoubtedly, it was a rude awakening when I arrived in Gettysburg only to feel like the ONE gay person on the entire campus. My hometown of Pasadena is a moderately conservative area and yet I had AT LEAST six gay/bi friends in high school. I never imagined that a college campus with students from around the globe would have LESS. It made absolutely no sense to me, so Thank God I met Jai in my creative writing class. Had she not come up to me after hearing my story, The Object of Obsession, I wouldn't have known an on-campus gay community even existed. Back then, it was very underground... literally.

The Initiation [Movie Transcript]

Hi, my name is James. I'm a Senior at Gettysburg College, and this is where our story begins--well, granted four years ago this wasn't a parking lot... but nevertheless, here we go.

I came to Gettysburg College from Pasadena, Maryland. The first thing I did when I got here was join the Marching Band; I had been playing for eight years. However, I was dismayed when I arrived to find that the last gay person to step foot here was Carson Kressley, of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy fame.

Dismayed by the lack of a Gay & Lesbian community here, I threw myself into my writing. After listening to one of my gayer stories, a friend named Jaimie Schock invited me to a meeting later that night. She told me to meet her in the Chapel and I had no idea why. I arrived and she led me down into the basement. And I had no idea where the hell we were going...

(Playing ♫ Over At The Frankstein Place ♫ by Alkaline Trio)
There's a light,
In the darkness of
Every bright life.

THE FEMINIZATION OF MEN IN JAPANESE ANIME/MANGA: Jet's A Big, Burly Man Type of Man! (Anime Panel) [DELETED SCENE]

Adaeze: So I picked up a manga (Japanese comic book) and I was just looking through thinking, "Wait. There's sex."

DeLue: And it's being sold in a convenience store! (laughter)

Adaeze: And there are random things happening, so I'm in the middle of the convenience store reading, then my 12-year-old host brother came over, so I was like, "Shit! (puts the magazine away) Hi, how are you?"

DeLue: In regards to the feminization of men, for the most part, that's only in hentai ("straight and gay porn") and yaoi ("boy sex"). In regular anime, you have a representation of men as very masculine, and also a representation of men who are far more feminine. And that's just representing the diversity of people. But y'know, you have people like Jet, who's like this big burly man kind of man... and then you have people like Spike, who are very much not big burly man kind of men. You know what I mean? But when you get into yaoi and hentai, you get much less of the big burly man type of man and more of the much not burly man type of man. Sorry for my... BIG BURLY MAN TYPE OF MAN!

Adaeze: DeLue's going crazy.

Lyndsey: So, DeLue, what type of man are you?

DeLue: I'm a BIG BURLY MAN TYPE OF MAN! (laughter) NOT A NOT BIG BURLY MAN TYPE OF MAN!

Adaeze: You wanna say it one more time?

Megan: I saw you. You were thinking about it.

Adaeze: We should just take a picture of you. (gesture)

DeLue: When you bring this up, you've gotta be like, this person's into hentai, this person's into anime, and this person's into BIG BURLY TYPE OF MAN! (flails) HE'S A MAN TYPE OF MAN BURLY TYPE OF BIRD BIG BIRD--

Megan: Just stop.

Adaeze: Yeah. (laughter)

Lyndsey: You almost said "bird."

DeLue: BIG BIRDY MAN TYPE OF MAN!

Adaeze: REALLY??!

IT WAS THE GREATEST COMIC BOOK EVER: It Had Crossdressing and Same-Sex Marriage (Adaeze)

I started out with Japanese manga and anime when I was in 5th grade, I watched Sailor Moon on Cartoon Network. I did not know it was called anime or was Japanese at the time. All I knew was that it was better than the other cartoons on TV. I moved on to watch Yu Yu Hakyusho, Dragon Ball, and Dragon Ball Z on the same channel and watched them uncensored on Adult Swim.

I read my first graphic novel which I thought was the greatest thing ever and read it several times. I still have it and I noticed it had some gay undertones with male crossdressing and male-male marriage. I read my first offical manga in high school, freshmen year. It was called Fake and was a yaoi which is really funny now that I think about it. My first straight anime was Fruits Basket. Manga and Anime really influenced my love for Japan and Japanese culture. It was a major reason why I took Japanese in high school instead of Spanish or French.

I did not find out about yuri until one of my friends told me about it. This was at the time I was struggling with my sexuality and reading yuri, in a way, helped me come to a realization that I'm bisexual. Though I prefer yuri over yaoi because yuri most of the time is drawn to please straight men's fantasy of two women together. There are a few yuri that I have read that actually has a good plotline and goes in-
depth with the relationship instead of straight sex. I prefer shojo-ai ("girl love") instead of yuri ("girl sex") because of that reason but I have read a yuri with a well written plot.

Yaoi and shonen-ai are better written and have developing relationships and multiple situations, it's still written for women because some of the sex scenes are unrealistic, like virgins being penetrated without preparation and saying it felt good when in reality, it hurts like hell.

Overall I love anime and manga because it goes beyond what comics and cartoons offer here. There is even manga about inter-sexed people and lovers with disabilities (they are so cute!). Bascially, there is a genre of manga and anime for everyone but never read shoutacon or lolicon because it has pedophilic content *shudders*

I FEEL DIFFERENT, EVEN AMONG OTHER LESBIANS: I'm Not A Femme And I Don't Act Stereotypically Black (Nelly)

I wouldn't say I've felt hostility so much as apathy from the LGBTQ community for personal reasons as well. I'm naturally a quiet person who has some issues opening up and making small talk (probably stemming with being uncomfortable with my manly sounding voice when women want "women"), and haven't felt exactly comfortable in the little group I've come to know.

A lot of it comes from the height/weight proportion, I'm sure, along with my race. I'm easily written off because I'm not an average height/average weight, white, extroverted lesbian. I'm completely different from most of the other lesbians I know on campus, and have been called an "oreo" more times than I can count from the black girls, lol.

Oh my goodness, let us *not* get into my terrible luck in the dating pool! I seem to have found the pattern to be this:
- Meet the girl
- Dig the girl
- Girl gets girlfriend
It's pretty sad actually. Part of it is due to the issues stated above; and, I think, part of it has to do with I'm not on their radar as a potential at all. I can't say much about Gettysburg, but down here in Maryland, and especially at UMBC, it seems the lesbian dating pool is so small half the girls know your ex-girlfriend(s) and the other half want nothing to do with you.

I think more girls are scared of my butch-ness than anything. And being seen with someone who is pretty much gay isn't something they can probably handle. Because I can't change my appearance when I'm comfortable in it.

GAY-on-GAY CRIME: I Only Felt Hostility From Closet Gays and Non-ALLiES Members (James)

Ironically, during my 4-year career at Gettysburg College, I've felt hostility/resentment from NOTHING BUT gay students, for personal reasons. Mostly, I've felt hostility from CLOSETED gay people and gay non-ALLiES members on this campus. I guess they've had cold attitudes toward me because they know that I know that they know... Plus, I enjoy drawing attention to myself and to the cause most dear to my heart: gay rights/equality for all.

I think I'm one of the few GLBT students who doesn't have a problem getting dates, but sustaining a relationship's a whole different ballgame. I've had a few guys mention in casual conversation that they're into a certain type of guy, one who doesn't match my physical description (eg. weight, hair color).

I have a much easier time attracting men back in Maryland than I do here. As a result of trial and error, my potential date criteria has become more and more strict. What can I say? It's extremely difficult to find an out & proud, politically active, respectable guy to date @ Gettysburg College.

I've seen people's attitudes toward me change once they found out that not only was I gay but that I find no problem talking about it. It hurts to see how many "friendly" guys I've scared away because they were afraid of their names being associated with mine.

GETTYSBURGIANS ARE PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE: No One Ever Said Anything To My Face (James)

Even though I'm from a predominantly White area (Pasadena, MD), I didn't experience an intense feeling of racial discrimination. The first time I actually realized I was different from my classmates was in the 1st grade when a kid yelled, "You're out, Black boy!" during a heated game of Kickball... my older brother kicked his ass the next morning, and it never happened again.

Other than that, no one has ever said anything racist TO MY FACE. The closest anyone has ever come has been shouting slurs from a speeding pick-up truck. In that sense, there are more outspoken bigots back home than there are at Gettysburg College.

Almost my entire life, I've been a very thin guy and I've been teased relentlessly about it by family, friends, and even strangers. What can I say? I ran track, did gymnastics, danced, practiced vegetarianism, and was constantly training to be stunt double... of course, I'm thin and toned! As the doctors have all told my parents, I'm in optimal health. I've always body image issues and only recently have I told my friends how much their comments (no matter how loving) really hurt me.

Surprisingly, I have never really encountered discrimination based on my sexuality, mainly because I didn't come out until my senior year of high school. At Gettysburg College, I find that everyone, in general, is passive-aggressive and prefers to say things behind each other's backs. I've felt accepted here, mostly because I tried to be upfront and honest from the very beginning.

Not until I came to Gettysburg had I even encountered people from the upper middle class and above. And typically, I don't associate with them because I don't believe that they take their education as seriously as those of us who are here on academic scholarships.

Whenever I hear about some Right Wing idiot trying to take away the rights of law-abiding gay citizens, I get extremely upset and am very likely to join an online protest, donate to an advocacy group, etc. Similarly, if there's been a gay bashing at a school, I will somehow acknowledge it, and bitch about it with my friends. However, when it's an isolated incident like that, I'm not as likely to take extreme action.

As you can guess, I identify myself as 1) Male, 2) Gay, 3) Black, 4) Educated, 5) Pagan, and 6) Middle Class.

I've been an active member of ALLiES (Gay-Straight Alliance) since my freshman year. Jai [Schock] initiated me, because we had Creative Writing together, and one of my stories had gay characters... even though it wasn't made obvious. I'm in ALLiES because I want to do everything I can to "fight the good fight," and make sure that future generations will live in a world of GLBT equality.

I WAS a member of the NAACP during my freshman year, as well. However, the group was extremely disorganized and never got anything done at meetings. Being an anal-retentive person, it really bugged me and I never came back.

I'm also a member of the GAIA Pagan Society, which is a nice forum for people who don't exclusively practice Christianity. It's comforting to have a group where people, gay and straight, can discuss spirituality and participate in religious rituals.

FAGGOT: Why Try To Reclaim It? (Adaeze)

"Faggot" is one of the weirdest words ever! Come on! I do not know how a term for a bundle of sticks came to be a derogatory word for homosexuals. Really, people should stop using the term because it just makes them sound unintellgent.

Also, for those trying to "reclaim" the word faggot, why? Same with black people trying to reclaim the word "nigger" by changing the "er" to "a." Both words have a history of loss, struggle, and pain so why try and reclaim the word when the gay community is trying to fight against the discrimination and win justice and equality? Seriously when the group being discriminated using the same discriminatory words against themselves, isn't that self-hate?

A SOLDIER'S LIFE IS NOT FOR ME: I Don't Take Kindly To Being Yelled At and I Hate To Run (Nelly)

First of all, No. I've been told by my father that joining the military would be a daft move on my part. A few of my friends are in the military right now; they can't wait to get out. I don't take well to being yelled at and hate running, so it'd ultimately be a waste of time on my part. And yet, the Marines were the last to call my house...

I'd prefer to serve the country in ways that I know how to and excel at: computer work is something I'm much, much better with, and helping to protect those that might not be able to protect themselves is something much better.

I think those soldiers who come out after serving are some of the bravest people I know. Because they face repercussions from those they served with, and being ostracized from the life they knew. To think they survived and have to survive coming out later is just something I can't fathom.

Considering I'm not exactly the most religious person on the planet, I would have to say I can't be a priest to something that so blatantly gives a hypocritical stance on homosexuality. I mean, how would others like it if I hated their sins and not them? "Oh, I hate that you cheat on your significant other every chance you get, but I love you regardless!" How is homosexuality any different from any other sin?

More power to those that praise God and live how they live, be they homosexual or not. I can't exactly do what they do, because I don't believe in their God, but if they're happy, that's really all that matters in my book.

I WOULD JOIN THE ARMY: If I Actually Believed There Were Legitimate Reasons For Fighting (James)

As long as the United States is caught up in unjust warfare around the world, I won't even consider enlisting. However, I will try my best to still support the soldiers, because it's not their fault; they're just doing their job, which is to follow orders.

If the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy was repealed AND if I was 100% sure that we were fighting the correct enemy, then of course, I would want to protect and defend my country. My grandfather, father and some of his brothers, were members of the U.S. Army, but members of my father's generation have drawn parallels between the current situation and the ridiculous Vietnam War, and they've convinced me to avoid the military even more.

I think it's extremely heroic and admirable to see soldiers serving their time and then, coming out of the closet not much later. The fact that they not only fought in the military but that they SURVIVED, shows that gays & lesbians are just as capable on the battlefield, and if GLBT individuals are willing to enlist, then why make them hide their sexual identities?

I could never be an official in a religion which viewed homosexuality as a sin. However, I could understand how some GLBT people would want to show their devotion to God. I admire them for having their own interpretation of God's message, instead of bowing down to a holy institution (eg. the Vatican).

Back in high school, a few of my Catholic friends back home were very friendly with openly-gay students, and they would always say, "Hate the sin, not the sinner," as if they were being profound. It doesn't come out and say it, but it implies that you should hate an essential part of someone: his/her sexuality. It's like saying, "I don't hate YOU personally... I just hate that you date members of your own sex." It's very confusing and hypocritical if you ask me.

Even though I'm not a fan of any organized religion, I would love to embrace my spirituality, express my devotion to a higher power, and train for a position in a Pagan (nature-based worship/ritual) sect.

GENDER IS A STATE OF MIND: Gender Isn't Purely Biological But A Mental Construct (James)

Having taken a Women’s Studies course [WS251: Women & Nazism] for the very first time last semester, I’ve had feminist theory hammered into my brain. I accept the idea of masculine and feminine constructs, but I believe that they’re pure myth based on male and female archetypes. That said, I don’t believe that they are biologically ingrained in us.

There’s extreme overlap between so-called male and female behaviors. The idea of men’s work vs. women’s work seems to only become an issue when a woman is incapacitated by a uniquely female issue (ie. pregnancy). I agree with Nelly when she says that male and female behaviors are not set in stone and definitely are not mutually exclusive.

I, too, love it when people transcend gender boundaries. Moreover, I just love it when people do what isn’t expected of them. My most recent transgression was performing a group Bellydance at the Dance Ensemble’s fall recital. Besides that, I dress up for the Gender-Bender Dance every year, I like baking stuff for my housemates, and I care a lot about how my clothes look on me.

However, I have no desire whatsoever to be a woman. I treasure my masculinity: my love of horror movie gore, my dreams of being a stunt double, my hidden desire to punch my ex square-in-the-nose... I guess it all reminds me that I may be gay but that doesn’t make me any less of a man.

I LOVE GENDERFUCKS: I've Broken Plenty Of Gender Stereotypes In My Day (Nelly)

Hmm... while there are "masculine" and "feminine" energies, I don't really think there's much difference between the two. I especially don't believe there's anything that could be considered exclusive to either category. As for that man's work vs. woman's work... if you think about it, things considered woman's work nowadays were men's work before the World Wars. So that entire idea is pretty dumb in my opinion.

Men act more upon their aggressions than women do I think. Or act upon them in a different way. Women can be violent. Men can be very passive as well. Both genders bring love to a relationship. The difference lies within the sphere of *how* they bring it and how they show their love I think. Women are more open about it while men are probably a little more reserved, as that's what's expected of them. A lot of it is based upon expectations to conform with the norm.

I love it with people are genderfucks! I'm more "masculine" in attire and sometimes in my behavior as well, so I'm a little bit biased to those who don't fit in a little box. I've broken plenty of gender stereotypes in my day: I'm the one my parents turn to when it comes to putting furniture together, as my brother sucks at doing so. I cook, do dishes (when I absolutely have to), clean when I have to, and can fix a computer. I know how to jump a car too.

Being what's classified as a butch lesbian also forces me to break gender stereotypes wherever I go. And to break stereotypes everyone may have about butches.

I'M BLACK AND I ORIGINALLY SIDED WITH RON PAUL: When He Didn't Get Nominated, I Switched To Obama (Adaeze)

I'm liberal, but I don't side with a party. I did vote for Barack Obama. In the beginning of the Presidential race, I was rooting for Ron Paul because he shared the same values as I did. I think ALLiES should be non-partisan. I wish more gay students and teachers were apart of ALLiES but it's a choice.

I couldn't be with someone who had a completely different political view than me. I don't mind slight different views on political topics but like Nelly, I don't think I could handle the girl who says "I don't support gay marriage, but I want to marry you someday." come on! That's just stupid.

Ah well, all’s fair in love not war.

I RECENTLY DATED A LOG CABIN REPUBLICAN: She'd Say, "I Don't Support Gay Marriage, But I Want To Marry You Someday" (Nelly)

I think I could classify myself, politically, as a liberal democrat. I'm registered with the Democratic Party. I'm not very political, so there's few issues I care very much for. However, the issues I care most for are: gay marriage (duh), environment awareness, better compensation for educators, more affordable higher education, and loosening the stranglehold on the middle class.

I voted in the most recent Presidential election. I didn't do much to help out in the political process; I simply made sure my friends were registered and going to vote that day. Considering I skipped my night class to watch the results, I was very happy to see Barack Obama won the election. I felt proud of my country for doing something unprecedented; and proud of my age bracket for actually voting.

I don't go to Gettysburg, so I'm not at liberty to answer anything about ALLiES =)

I can answer the last section of questions though!

So... I dated a conservative log cabin Republican recently. It was very aggravating that we were on complete opposite sides of the spectrum. I never actually thought a difference in political views would bother me, but I now know it definitely does. I'm politically apathetic for the most part, but if someone says something hypocritical like my ex did ("I don't support gay marriage, but I want to marry you someday") that's gonna stick with me and bother me for a long, long time. I'm sure I could date someone who's completely apathetic to politics; now, if it lasted would be the larger question.

KIDS? YES, PLEASE!: I Need Someone Who Wants A Big Family (Adaeze)

Love is what drives me to get up every morning. I'm a super passionate romantic to the T. Not only for a lover but also for family and friends. That's just how I get down. I want to believe in love at first sight, because it does happen but most times, people are only physically attracted to another person that they may like.

I've never been in love but I know that when I do it is when I love the "flaws" in that person and vice versa. When I can argue with my love and some time later make up. I know it maybe impossible but I want a everlasting love that my mother and father had before he passed away. I told my mother that if she wanted to remarry that my siblings and I would support her but she told me that my father was the only man she could ever love. I want to love and love in that way.

Ok. So I've been planning my dream wedding since forever! *squeal*

My wedding will take place in a stone castle in Ireland during the fall season. I love rich royal colors but I can come to a compromise with my wife or husband (if either is into party planning). I want my sister to be my maid of honor. Also I want bridesmaids and “bridesmen” because I have more guy friends then girls.

My wedding dress is going to be form-fitting Victorian-esque with a trumpet skirt, very elegant. The back will be a upside down curved triangle cutout and as the cutout turns into the skirt seam, that seam will be lined with 4 or 5 buttons. The dress will be a strapless dress made of silk and has a lace like design. The top of the dress will be an attached lace (kind of like a lace borelo with a high neck (as seen here).

The after party: I would like an opening speech and couple's first dance but after that, let the party begin! Open bar and buffet!

Oh, I will have a registry for presents because getting 10 toasters, >.<, Epic fail.

All this can change over time (maybe not the dress ^_^) but a girl can dream, can't she? ^.^

Sad reality: more people may show up to my wedding if it’s to a guy, sigh...silly relatives, oh well

Kids? Yes, please! I really want 10 kids (5 girls, 5 boys). I need someone who wants to have a really big family and live on a farm.

If I'm married to a guy, I'll have two kids the “Birds and the Bees way,” but the other eight, I will be adopting because I've wanted to adopt since middle school.

If it is to a woman, it depends, I wouldn't want to go to a sperm bank or shag a friend but if she wanted to go this route then I would be fine with it, but I'm still going to adopt. ^^ Pwease?