I've Known Since I Met You, HAVE YOU MET YOU?! [Director's Commentary]

Yes, I'm one of those people who had the pleasure of meeting Bill back in 2005, when he was not only in the closet but homophobic. Like most people, I knew he was gay the moment we met but when I learned that he wasn't anywhere close to coming out, I didn't really try to be his friend. After some humiliating experiences with "closet cases," I found it best to simply avoid them altogether, especially if they poke fun at gays in order to affirm their heterosexuality. Along with the older ALLiES members, I was happy to put the past behind us and welcome Bill into the group during our senior year; he has become extremely comfortable with his sexuality, and I'm proud of him for being honest with himself and everyone else.


I understand Bill's predicament; for most of us, our families have acted as barriers, preventing us from coming out to everyone. In my house, my father didn't show much hostility towards gay people; he just had the attitude that they didn't really exist and if they did, they only lived in segmented parts of urban areas like NYC. Coming from a socially and politically conservative family, I can imagine that he's had a much harder time gaining full acceptance from them. To this day, he still identifies as a die-hard Republican, and I would chock that up to family influence.

I've Known Since I Met You, HAVE YOU MET YOU?! [Movie Transcript]

Bill: OK, so my Coming Out was a little bit later than most people's. I didn't come out until I was 20. It was the end of my sophomore year of college.

I think I've known that I was gay probably since I was 7th grade, because I just kinda knew I liked boys. But I never really want to admit it to myself because I didn't want to be different. And I was also raised in a homophobic household where my dad constantly told me that gay people were less than everyone else, so I didn't want to be apart of that.

So I just repressed it within me until I came to college, at the end of my sophomore year. I first came out to one of my friends here and told her. I said, "I think I'm gay." And she goes, "Yeah... I've known that since I met you. HAVE YOU MET YOU? It's pretty obvious that you are!" So I was like, "Alright."

And I learned to accept myself pretty quickly, so I was happy with that. How I realized I was gay? I had a guy friend who was just my friend but I realized that, to me, he was more than a friend. I was really attracted to him. ...Nothing ever happened but it did get me to Come Out.

On the Gettysburg campus, a lot of people think that it's a really homophobic school but I haven't really had any problems. I'm out to all of my friends here. And I would say that I'm completely Out. If anyone ever asked me, I would always tell them. I don't just volunteer it... without there being a reason for me to tell somebody I'm gay usually. But I would say I'm totally Out.

At home... not so much. Both my parents know but they've asked me not to tell any other family members because, I guess, it'll embarrass them. So I haven't told any other family members.

So yeah, my Coming Out was definitely stressful because I knew it was going to be a tough issue at home. My mom's OK with it now, but for my dad, it's definitely tough for him. So I try to be understanding to the fact that he doesn't really accept it, but it's kinda hard.

ON MY GAYDAR: Not Everyone's OUT Of The Closet (Bill) [DELETED SCENE]

So one really difficult thing about dating in the gay world is dealing with closeted people. Gay people have GAYdar: We know when someone's gay, we're not stupid, we can figure this out pretty quickly.

I had a friend, and I knew he was gay. We hung out a lot and became really good friends and I became really attracted, but he was still trying to hold onto the fact that he was straight. He still is today.

I mean, maybe he is gay, maybe he is not, but it plays with gay people's minds a little bit when they have straight friends who they're attracted to because they can't have them. Although they've made this great emotional connection with them and feel like he/she's possibly their soulmate, they don't even have a shot! And it's really difficult because you can totally fall in love with someone and they're not even the right sexual orientation for you to be together.

So I think that's a challenge for a lot of gay people and it definitely has been a challenge for me at least twice.

TIGHT-KNIT: I Was Told Not To Inform My Extended Family (Bill)

My family is huge and relatively close. My parents are still married. Mom's side of the family is very close, and I'm definitely the odd one out. My mom and I are relatively close, as are my sister and I, but I'm not close to my dad.

My mom and sister have accepted my sexuality for the most part, but aren't totally comfortable with it. My dad chooses to ignore it. No one else in my extended family knows because my parents have told me that I'm not allowed to tell anyone. After I graduate college, I'll be moving on and my family really won't be a huge part of my life anymore.