Let’s lay it out here... I had depression really bad and most people—not all but most—would never expect it outside of normal pressures and drama. Depression gets the best of me at a lot of points in my life but would be far worse had I not found my true lover... Mary Jane.
I smoke constantly. Sometimes for fun, sometimes to be able to do work, sometimes to clear my head and forget the bullshit that tends to surround me. Its a way to cope in times of trouble and a way to just chill out with my best friends because 90% of them do it too.
I smoke cigarettes like a chimney too. Its a habit at this point and I think its supported by my anxiety. I always need a cigarette in my hand when I’m walking round campus to keep my hands busy. Otherwise I’m constantly fidgeting. But at this point in my life, it's just an addiction and part of my routine I wish I never had began.
.... And caffeine is my lifeline (James, you know, you just saw me buy 3 Rockstars haha). I don't think it’s an addiction as much as it is I have a high tolerance for caffeine. But there are days I can't get through without my Monster or Rockstar.
I've never dated anyone who did anything more than smoke bud while I was with them. My ex was a cokehead for a minute but that ended before I even met her. There was always a fear she'd go back to her old ways but she proved me wrong and stayed away from drugs. In our case, pot was the reason we stayed together so long I feel. Fights would become meaningless after a couple hits of a blunt and we'd be best friends in an instant.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment