BIG FAMILY: I Already Had A Gay Uncle (Nelly)

My family is a decent size. If you include all of my friends (wayward and otherwise) who tend to stop in and mom has subconsciously adopted as one of her own, we're HUGE.

Biologically, I'm the second of four kids. I have an older brother (24), and two younger sisters (15 and 9). We have three dogs, so the house is usually pretty busy. My parents are still together, and will actually be celebrating their 25th anniversary on the 29th this month, which we relentlessly tease them about being old. We're not the *tightest* knit family, as we're all doing our own thing, but we don't hate each others' guts all the time either. I used to be super-close to my brother (to the point of physical fights), but I guess I'm closest to my mom now. Couldn't really tell ya; I usually keep to myself as it is.

I tease my immediate sister about her friends always calling, telling her to stop cheating on each of them with the other. She gets so pissed about it, though I know she's straight and she knows she's straight. Everyone knows I'm gay. I've had my girlfriends over the house before, and no one's really cared. Lately the youngest has been acting weird about it, but she's 9 so I'm not exactly surprised. I forget sometimes that she's 9, as she's such a big kid and most days acts older than she is. I can't say anyone struggles with their sexual identities in the house.

I feel a *lot* of pressure to be a role model to my siblings, especially my younger sisters. I'm the first kid to go to college, and the first one to graduate and get any sort of degree. My mom bitches about the way I dress, and if I have a girlfriend over (which I don't now) that I need to show my sisters that it's *not* okay to have the door shut and someone you're romantically committed to in there with you. It's rough, but I'm so used to it now that I just ignore the frustrations that go along with people expecting the best from you at all times.

It was pretty easy to come out to my family. I told my mom first, as my uncle's gay too (her brother). Then she asked me "if you're so attracted to females, why do you dress so boyishly?" which had *no* correlation whatsoever and pissed me off. My sisters found out later, and my brother was the one who partly outed me to my parents (as I wanted t.A.T.u.'s CD and he was like "they're lesbians from Russia" when I asked for it). Dad and I don't talk much, unless it's about computers and what I did to mine lately, so no problems there. I think my brother has the most issue with my success rates with girls, and how he's never had a girlfriend (he's jealous). And, of course, my brother accepts me but has an issue with gay guys, which I've gotten on his case about regularly.

And, for the younger groups, they use me as their confidant and tell me a lot of their secrets... especially the gay boys. It's weird, but empowering all the same.